I Hate this…

I’m struggling with being thankful. I HATE that we have all this medical stuff back in our house again. The vest machine, nebulizer, oxygen, feeding pump, formula… I hate that she had to drive the scooter in the store today while wearing oxygen and got looks from shoppers and store employees. I feel like we were given an amazing gift only for it to be ripped away. Were we not thankful enough? There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of her donor and thank God for this gift.  She really wants to go to Lion King rehearsal tomorrow and I hope she will. But I’m afraid that she won’t be able to physically handle it and it will discourage her mentally.  I’m so mad this happened. I don’t understand. She went through so much to just have one year of really living and now she can’t even walk across the house without getting out of breath. It’s not right! And again I’ll admit that I’m mad a God for allowing this to happen. I really hope the photopheresis will help her feel better. All I can say is seeing her like this really sucks. 

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